I am so sorry.

January 24th, 2013

Yesterday, I made a mistake. Without thinking, I made a post on Hacker News in response to some other posts that other Hacker Newsers made, and I want to apologize.

I value blending in to society. I value making the pretense of caring about others. I value shutting the fuck up instead of arguing with retards about all the stupid retarded shit that happens in Hacker News comment threads, who should know better than to share their inane opinions about shit that happens in the universe and the open source communities. Yesterday, I went against these principles and posted on Hacker News, and now I’m ashamed. There are constructive ways to talk about subject matter, but that’s irrelevant on Hacker News because there’s always another moron who’ll reply to you in a way that betrays total incomprehension of what you were saying. I will be thinking about avoiding these

Okay, this parody is getting lame. So anyway, fuck this guy: http://programmingtour.blogspot.com/2013/01/im-sorry.html

He’s so sorry that people found out he’s a complete asshole. He was pretending to be nice for years and years on the internet, and now everybody knows. Everybody knows that he’s an asshole!

Let’s hate him forever.

Here’s a Hacker News thread about that apology. http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5107264 Specifically, read the posts by __cle.

Military-Grade Encryption Here We Go

April 21st, 2012

Check out http://noplaintext.com/. It promises military-grade encryption, in the browser.

Here’s a fun game to play. Before visiting, try to guess what mistakes they made.

Then visit the site, and when you read exactly what they do, try to guess what mistakes they made.

Then look at the code and see what mistakes they made.

Then see what you missed (and what I missed).

So far:
- The encryption key is generated with 47.6 bits of entropy.
- It’s generated using Math.random().
- There is no message authentication. The server can flip individual bits within the message.
- Obviously we have to trust noplaintext.com to send us an uncompromised web page.
- It links to google-analytics, so we also have to trust the Google analytics people.
- It links directly to https://crypto-js.googlecode.com/files/2.5.3-crypto-sha1-hma…, so we also have to trust the crypto-js maintainer, and the googlecode.com people.
- The whole system depends on being able to share the URL securely. But if you can do that, you could have just sent the message securely over that channel.

Stupid Thinkpad Zealots

April 20th, 2012

There are some pictures out showing Thinkpads that have the chiclet-style keyboard previously seen on the X120e and X1. Now the X230, T430, T530, and W530 will have these chiclet-style keyboards instead of the previous generation of scissor-switch.

For example, see this thread: X230 picture – Lenovo Community

I am making this post to inform you that these people are completely retarded, of course.

What they’re really lamenting is their newfound inability too feel superior to other laptop users. Most people who have actually used the chiclet keyboard know that it’s just as good as, if not better than, the scissor-switch keyboard — for example, it’s more difficult for hair and dust to get lost between the keys. Also the mechanism is certainly less fragile, considering how fragile the scissor-switches are.

If you’re butthurt over the change of keyboard to something more affordable and reliable that doesn’t sacrifice key-press feel and maybe even improves on it, maybe you should look for other ways to feel superior to other computer users. You still have the smugness of the trackpoint (even though I’m using a Sony Vaio that has a superior pointing stuck), and also your laptop puts out a really nice and clean VGA signal, not one of those disgusting impure VGA signals produced by the otherbranded trash.

Another option is to get a Panasonic Let’s Note SX. It has a 1600×900 12.1″ screen or 1280×800 in some configs, so you can’t complain about resolution. It has this circular trackpad which people regard as stupid until they stop regarding it and start using it, at which point they know it’s better than any other mouse device. It has a built-in DVD drive IN THE PALMREST and it is lighter and allegedly has much better battery life than an X220. The keyboard is not some craptacular chiclet keyboard, in fact it has less row height than the Thinkpad keyboard, which is nice for your fingers, unless you’re too fat-fingered to hit the shorter keys. It’s even more durable than the Thinkpad, that’s right, your “magnesium roll cage” machine is not actually more durable than everything else, you whiny little shit. I don’t have one, because the base model costs $2600 and I’m not an idiot and I already have too many laptops. But you could have one, and then your laptop would be better than other people’s, and you’d be better than other people for knowing it’s better. Are you going to put a price on your own superiority?

Music

March 4th, 2012

Programming music is annoying. The question of how to combine ideas of notes and instruments and waveforms into a song is probably more interesting than the art of concatenating strings into an HTML document. At first I thought I’d make things by combining arrays of samples using some array-of-samples-combiners and objects with this interface:

struct Music {
    // dumps [beg, end) of our sample region to out.
    virtual void Dump(vector<pair<int16_t, int16_t> >& out,
                      int32_t beg, int32_t end) = 0;
    // the length of this musical passage, in 1/44100ths of a second.
    virtual int32_t Length() = 0;
};

The problem with that is you can’t just tweak the shape of some sound without e.g. knowing how it’s normalized and such. Also it’s not the right toolkit for playing a note out loud.

Also it’s stereo. Do we want to support mono tracks?

So now I’m going with having some primitive sounds that have amplitude 1.0, frequency 1.0, and manipulators that can screw around with them, and then things can parameterize them into notes somehow. More details will be present within the next 13 hours.

void mainers

November 18th, 2011

There exists this disease on the Internet which is the set of people who react badly to things such as this:

void main() {
    printf("Hello, world!\n");
}

They’ll flare their hoods and puff out, “main should be declared to return int and not void because that’s what the C++ standard says, your code is non-standard and thus it’s bad!” Well gee, it would be just horrid if somebody porting the code had to change the return value of one function.

The problem with you, if you’re one of these people, is that you have nothing better to say.  This is the sort of thing where you sit in your chair at your computer like the little smugnesty you are and find some petty fault in the way other people do things.  Guess what: you’re unimportant and you don’t matter.  You should find something more important to bitch about, like problems with people’s code that actually matter.  Or problems with people bitching about code that doesn’t matter.

Neuromancer

March 6th, 2011

Once upon a time Case tried to hack into the mysterious computer system.  But the Ice was too good and sent some kind of back-signal.  The circuit breakers on his neural interface activated and powered down his deck.

Then he realized that he was a big nerd and there’s no reason he couldn’t get a well-paying job writing software for some morally upright company that made life-saving medical devices.

The End.

Speculation

March 5th, 2011

From the wipe(1) man page:

I hereby speculate that harddisks can use the spare remapping area to secretly make copies of your data. Rising totalitarianism makes this almost a certitude. It is quite straightforward to implement some simple filtering schemes that would copy potentially interesting data. Better, a harddisk can probably detect that a given file is being wiped, and silently make a copy of it, while wiping the original as instructed.

Recovering such data is probably easily done with secret IDE/SCSI commands. My guess is that there are agreements between harddisk manufac‐ turers and government agencies. Well-funded mafia hackers should then be able to find those secret commands too.

Phone providers

March 4th, 2011

I got a phone plan for my Nexus S and gosh t-mobile is faster than AT&T. It’s amazing how unaware I was of how much AT&T sucked.  The Android operating system rocks.  At least it’s better than the iPhone 3 OS.  The UI is better, the on-screen keyboard is nicer.  All in all.  The voice recognition seems to work.  Yes it seems to work it is actually working this is being spoken.  Okay now it’s not working very well. I think you can say your perios very well or I for got what size. THERE ARE OBVIOUSLY SOME FLAWS.  The best plan with T-Mobile is pay-as-you-go.

Strongly Recommended Books

February 19th, 2011

After asking what books to recommend, I’d say my strong recommendations are as follows. These are the books you should read:

Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson
A Fire Upon the Deep by Vernor Vinge

That’s it! Or is it? I mean, seriously, what else is there to read?

Is Neuromancer a requirement for modern society? It fits the category. It might have been a must-read in the eighties. But today? Hmm, yes. Read it.

Neuromancer by William Gibson

Oh, what about Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card? You’ll enjoy that, but it doesn’t make the list. It’s a relatively unimportant book.

Is there anything else? I hear Blindsight is a must-read. I have not yet read it. Oh, I know:

Red Mars by Kim Stanley Robinson

Oh yes. Is there anything else? I’m weak on my Philip K Dick. And I’ve never read Permutation City. I tried reading Schismatrix but couldn’t get through it.

Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality by Eliezer Yudkowsky

That’s mandatory reading.

There are lots of books I take for granted, because I read them when I was too young to appreciate them. Such as

Dune by Frank Herbert

What’s so good about that book? I don’t know.

What’s the ultimate Stross book? That’s what I want. It feels like there are a bunch of awesome yet non-mandatory books by Stross. Accelerando is the closest. Hmm, closest to the pin by way of being in the hole. But it could be better.

Accelerando by Charles Stross

I have to admit I’m more a fan of movies than reading. There are lots of mandatory movies I could recommend. But that’s for another post.

Ohhhh

Foundation by Isaac Asimov

And

Starship Troopers by Richard Heinlein

So there we go. There are the books you should read.

Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson
A Fire Upon the Deep by Vernor Vinge
Neuromancer by William Gibson
Red Mars by Kim Stanley Robinson
Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality by Eliezer Yudkowsky
Dune by Frank Herbert
Accelerando by Charles Stross
Foundation by Isaac Asimov
Starship Troopers by Richard Heinlein

OC Remixes

February 17th, 2011

I’ve started downloading some of the recent OC Remixes.  They are pretty good!  Back in high school, they were the first “good” music (in my mind, at the time, and other than classical and Billy Joel) that I had listened to.  It is frustrating when you download one that has lyrics, though (*deleted*).  I think the average remix has significantly improved in quality.

My favorite is still … oh.. there are too many.  Lunatic Moon?  Ascension To Cosmo Canyon?  Triforce Majeure?  The Twelfth Commandment?  The non-OC remix Darkest Omen?  Jenova for Classical Piano?  JENOVAD Trance?  Terra in Black?  Ocarina Boogie?  GiftFromMoscow?  McVaffeQuasi Ultimix?  JustaLittleMore (Prime Edit)?  Space Orchestral?  Love Hurts?  Chronodyne Marine?  Calamitous Judgment?  Black Wind Rising?  Ruined World (Eternal Derelict)?  Subterranean Opus?  WhenAllHopeHasFaded?  Basilisk Run?  InMemryofSirAnthony?

Meh.